08 November 2008


Every day is one. Every day I face different challenges then the ones I faced the previous day.

With no attacks comes the ability to feel again. Feel freely. Feel emotion with no boundaries, and no fear of passing out.


All without passing out. All with their appropriate equals.

And it's overwhelming. For more then a year I haven't had to deal with the emotions. In the beginning I just had an attack. Towards the end I just stopped. I walked away or restrained myself for my own protection.

And now I don't have either of those endings. I have to deal with the emotions. I have to face the situations. And just like me forgetting my algebra from lack of practice, I haven't yet learned how to filter and feel correctly.

It'll take time. Lots and lots of time.
And changes.
And support.

Good thing I'll get all 3.


1 comment:

Laura said...

I am SOOO happy for you, though! It sounds like you've finally found meds that are effective and now you CAN start dealing with the emotional junk that comes along with life.

That doesn't mean it's easy. But you have so much going for you! And you are getting the help and support you need. I know you will be fine.

Lotsa luv to ya kiddo!!!